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Highlands Today

'Thanks for the memory'

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By Linda Downing | Highlands Today

Published: October 23, 2009

"Thanks for the memory," sang Bob Hope at the end of his shows. He spoke of good things, but memory can bless or curse. Ideally, we choose our recollections; but we must exert discipline to refuse them when they come unbidden and unwanted.

Jimmy Carter's recent mention of racial prejudice as a key to disrespect shown President Obama can edify only if it causes sincere soul searching. Obama downplays race, preferring to press it into our nation's history, a sad, shaping force that should no longer be used as excuse or cause. He sees it as a sidetrack from other critical issues.

Those with the experience best say some things. In February 2009 black columnist Walter Williams wrote in "Cowards About Race?": "If black people continue to accept the corrupt blame game agenda of liberal whites, black politicians and assorted hustlers, as opposed to accepting personal responsibility, the future for many black Americans will remain bleak." Those words reflect the views of creditable voices, like Bill Cosby, who use selective recall for good to project forward instead of back.

Some reminiscences float pleasantly in the subconscious until bidden by an unexpected jolt, like this September 2009 headline: "Cursive Writing May Be Fading Skill, But So What?" "So what?" cry the hearts of those who fondly remember hours of handwriting practice, getting just the right slant and curl to our letters. We treasure the unique beauty, the polished education, and the just-right pen. However, those sweet memories, or as James Barrie put it, "what God gave us so that we might have roses in December," do not speak to teachers or students caught in the computer moment.

Some mindless intrusions warrant examination: lurid song lyrics drowned out by loud instruments; ideologies, such as, utopia without God, hummed to the pleasant sounds of John Lennon's "Imagine." Thoughts need culling, keeping only what we believe, before, as an anonymous writer pictured, they are "a beaten path in the brain."

Scottish poet Alexander Smith said: "A man's real possession is his memory. In nothing else is he rich, in nothing else is he poor." If true, then Joan Didion, author of the memoir "The Year of Magical Thinking," is impoverished, despite winning the National Book Award and making the bestseller list. Her painful dissection of the loss of her husband and life-threatening illness of her daughter ends with abject hopelessness: "No eye is on the sparrow but he (her husband) did tell me that."

Contrast Carolyn Savage's odyssey in Toledo, Ohio. When she learned her fertility clinic implanted the wrong embryo, she chose to carry the baby boy to term and hand him over to his biological parents. She will file a gift memory instead of a mistake.

Mary hung on Jesus' every word. Her sister Martha, frenzied in food preparation, resented this. Jesus observed: "…you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her" (Luke 10:41 NIV). A current Ipsos poll speaks of a "generalized fear of the unknown." We can insure ourselves against it by hording only the best memories.

Finding truth requires the right starting point. That is the quest of this column. If you are a seeker of simple truth, we can find it together — side-by-side.

Linda M. Downing is a freelance writer. Contact her at lindadowning.com

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