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Highlands Today

Mistakes Happen, Even In Oconomowoc, Wis.

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By Raleigh Whiteman | Highlands Today

Published: April 2, 2009

There were several friends who commented somewhat favorable about last week's column regarding our country's financial state and what I surmised was causing the problem. One fellow found an error and wrote me an e-mail on the story about a couple who could not pronounce the name of the town they were in and asked the employee of a Burger King to pronounce the name of where they were very slowly Burrrrrr, gerrrrrr, Kiiiing.

He informed me that Burger King had been closed in the town of Oconomowoc for more than two years, and I should have used the name of another fast-food establishment.

I apologize for not knowing the facts.

The story had been in my archives for several years to use whenever I need a few words to finish the column.

It was signed from Mike Kerry, Oconomowoc, Wis.

Zillions

Another acquaintance who reads the column occasionally told me of an American CIA covert operative giving President Obama a briefing regarding a skirmish encounter down in South America. He told President Obama that they had lost a Brazilian.

"Wow, how many zeros is that?" the president exclaimed.

Growing Down

The PW and I bought one of those upside down tomato planters called the Topsy Turvy. You put the new seedling in the bottom of a container then fill it with soil with fertilizer. We hung it about five feet above the ground and started watering it. I noticed water draining over the leaves which told me I had put in plenty of moisture. The next day the leaves of the plant were wilted and shriveled, appearing to be dying. Evidently the fertilizer in the water was too much for the new leaves.

Saving For Love

Here is another story that has been sitting around waiting for me to have one of those brain-froze-and-can't-think days.

A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years. They had shared everything. They had talked about everything. They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little old woman had a shoe box in the top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about.

For all of these years, he had never thought about the box, but one day the little old woman got very sick and the doctor said she would not recover.

In trying to sort out their affairs, the little old man took down the shoe box and took it to his wife's bedside.

She agreed that it was time that he should know what was in the box.

When he opened it, he found two crocheted dolls and a stack of money totaling $95,000.

He asked her about the contents.

"When we were to be married," she said, "my grandmother told me the secret of a happy marriage was to never argue. She told me that if I ever got angry with you, I should just keep quiet and crochet a doll."

The little old man was so moved; he had to fight back tears. Only two precious dolls were in the box. She had only been angry with him two times in all those years of living and loving. He almost burst with happiness.

"Honey," he said, "that explains the doll, but what about all of this money?
Where did it come from?"

"Oh," she said, "that's the money I made from selling the dolls."

Raleigh Whiteman, of Lake Placid, is a contributing writer to Highlands Today. You can reach him on the Internet at rwwhiteman@comcast.net

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